It is easy to say “do not have expectation from anyone.” But its easier said than done! In any married relationship, high level of expectations are bound to exist. So what is the best way to cope with one’s expectations of others? There’s a simple principle – expect more from yourself than from others!
The essential thing to keep in mind is that although the expectations may be justified, one should realize that all expectations may not be fulfilled by his/her spouse. So when reality sets in, since you already realize that all your expectations may not get fulfilled, it is easier to accept.
I believe: “Have the least expectations from others and the highest expectations from yourself.” That is the right path to happiness and growth.
When one has the least expectations from others (by realizing that all his expectations may not be fulfilled), and things do not happen as one realizes, he is already prepared for this, so is able to accept the reality. When one has too many expectations from others and expects all to be fulfilled, the person gets hurt when they do not get filled some times, which hurts the relationship in turn.
On the other hand, I believe that one must have high expectations from oneself. This is very essential to one’s growth. If I do not have expectations to reach my goals, if I do not expect myself to perform or if I do not expect myself to become a better person, then I am not using my potential to the highest. If I have high expectations from myself, I will strive more and more to reach my goals, to be a performer and to become a better person.
So for peace of mind, realize that all your expectations (although justified), from the other person may not be fulfilled. And for one’s growth and excellence one should have high levels of expectations from oneself. So expect more from yourself and the lesser expectations from others.
Here’s wishing you all the excellence you desire!